It seems rare these days that I get to spend much, if any, uninterrupted, alone time with my older kids. There's the job or supper to make or laundry to do or their busy lives getting in the way. A day when I get to spend uninterrupted, alone time with all my kids on the same day is practically unheard of. Today was such a day. A blessed day. A magical day. I'm not sure they even noticed, but I did. I cherished it, and I'll cherish it for a long time. Spending time with them one on one just doesn't happen enough.
A track meet and lunch with my daughter. Playing catch and having a long conversation while sitting in the grass with my other daughter. Working in the back yard with my son. Playing for several hours with my youngest daughter. All alone. All uninterrupted. Maybe other parents get days like this all the time. I don't. My older kids are getting to that age where their parents means something different to them. It's not the same as it was. They rely on us far less. They don't need us to hold their hand. They don't want us to. They have their own relationships to tend to outside of the house. They have their own lives. My middle daughter is also finding her way. She's sowing her oats and carving out her own paths. I understand all this, but it doesn't make it easy. One of the hardest aspects of being a father for me has always been the fact that I'm needed less and less as they grow older, and I struggle with the reshaping of my identity where that's concerned. That's why I cherish days like these. I'm not trying to hold back time. I'm just trying to appreciate it more. I'm trying to appreciate the opportunities when they present themselves and not squander them. Loved this day.
A track meet and lunch with my daughter. Playing catch and having a long conversation while sitting in the grass with my other daughter. Working in the back yard with my son. Playing for several hours with my youngest daughter. All alone. All uninterrupted. Maybe other parents get days like this all the time. I don't. My older kids are getting to that age where their parents means something different to them. It's not the same as it was. They rely on us far less. They don't need us to hold their hand. They don't want us to. They have their own relationships to tend to outside of the house. They have their own lives. My middle daughter is also finding her way. She's sowing her oats and carving out her own paths. I understand all this, but it doesn't make it easy. One of the hardest aspects of being a father for me has always been the fact that I'm needed less and less as they grow older, and I struggle with the reshaping of my identity where that's concerned. That's why I cherish days like these. I'm not trying to hold back time. I'm just trying to appreciate it more. I'm trying to appreciate the opportunities when they present themselves and not squander them. Loved this day.
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