Thursday, May 10, 2012

Day 130, Thanks, RJ


Man, there’s something magical watching your kid from the outside in, witnessing her so full of life and so full of joy. Today, I did just that, just observing my little girl from outside her pre-school classroom, seeing her sitting there along with all the other little ones in her class, all cute and happy and absorbed in their little lives.

There’s something indescribable about knowing without question that your child is floating in her own little universe where nothing dark or foreboding or sinister is at work and nothing detrimental can reach her. There’s no danger looming. There aren’t threats imminent. She just exists in this glorious and enthusiastic and enthralling place.

I wish more than anything I could wrap that security and safety up and stow it away in her little backpack so that she could take it wherever she went. She could whip it out when she felt frightened or scared of the dark or lonely or overwhelmed and revel in instant pleasure.

I also wish more than anything I had more time to just watch and observe, just let that joy consume me. When I went into her classroom today after school was over and she so proudly showed me the Mother’s Day card she painted all by herself, I pretty much melted into a pool of pride and contentment. Watching her trying to contain her eagerness to give her mom the card, along with a little plant she potted in a Dixie cup, was about as much fun and pleasure as I’ve felt in months.

Life introduces a lot of obstacles and difficulties and challenges throughout the day. Some days, in fact, it seems that is all fills the hours. But man, if you just slow things down and live within the minute without looking back at the last one or looking forward to the next one, you’ll witness things that can brighten you. You’ll witness occurrences that ooze beauty. Some days play out as being mundane and ordinary and anything but special, but I’m recognizing it doesn’t take a once-a-year event or special day like a wedding or birthday or holiday to induce happiness. Turn yourself over to the possibilities and make yourself available to the opportunities and you can have that goodness a hell of a lot more often than may seem possible.

My daughter teaching me something every day without ever realizing it.  

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