This day has been one calamity after another. I mean, I haven't experienced a day like this in a long, long time (thankfully). It started brutal, it took another turn down an equally brutal street (literally), and it's ended up even more brutal. But at some point in mid-afternoon, I had somewhat of an epiphany: Things may get worse yet, big boy, but so what.
I think I've excepted that I can control only a very few things. Moreover, I can't control the way anyone thinks or reacts. I don't even won't to. I just want to put my head down and keep going full steam ahead. What comes, comes. What doesn't, doesn't. That's it. It's that simple.
Man, that's positive change for me. There was a day not that long ago when I would have obsessed about each and everything thing that had gone bad. I would have turned them over and over, pick and prodded, and then gone into angry, depressed mode for however long it took, all the while giving off the vibe that I didn't want to be screwed with. Today, I felt myself entering that all too familiar space and just backed off. Didn't run from it, just backed off. Recognized where that place was going to take me, knew it wasn't going to end up well in my favor, and turned around and walked the other way. That's a good progression for me, and I'm happy about, even if this day is the shits.
Tonight, I'll just lay my head on my pillow knowing the events of this or any other day won't always play out the way you want, and some days, the events will bash you upside the head in rapid repetition. But so what. They only leaves bruises. They don't hurt forever.
I think I've excepted that I can control only a very few things. Moreover, I can't control the way anyone thinks or reacts. I don't even won't to. I just want to put my head down and keep going full steam ahead. What comes, comes. What doesn't, doesn't. That's it. It's that simple.
Man, that's positive change for me. There was a day not that long ago when I would have obsessed about each and everything thing that had gone bad. I would have turned them over and over, pick and prodded, and then gone into angry, depressed mode for however long it took, all the while giving off the vibe that I didn't want to be screwed with. Today, I felt myself entering that all too familiar space and just backed off. Didn't run from it, just backed off. Recognized where that place was going to take me, knew it wasn't going to end up well in my favor, and turned around and walked the other way. That's a good progression for me, and I'm happy about, even if this day is the shits.
Tonight, I'll just lay my head on my pillow knowing the events of this or any other day won't always play out the way you want, and some days, the events will bash you upside the head in rapid repetition. But so what. They only leaves bruises. They don't hurt forever.
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